You’ve been dancing Salsa\/Bachata\/Zouk for awhile.\u00a0 You go to classes and workshops and parties.\u00a0 It’s natural that you want to help other people to dance better, so you start to teach other people during the party\/practica and even during other people’s classes.\u00a0 That’s really nice of you and others will definitely appreciate it, right?<\/p>\n
Wrong.<\/p>\n
This is one of the biggest complaints I hear from followers in all dances.\u00a0 As soon as a leader knows a little bit, they start trying to teach everyone.\u00a0 This mostly just annoys the follower and makes her not want to dance with the leader.<\/p>\n
If you want to teach, open a class and see who shows up.\u00a0 The people in your class agreed to be taught by you.\u00a0 *If they aren’t a student in your class, and they haven’t asked you to teach them, they did not agree to be your student*<\/em>.\u00a0 Most of the time, they won’t like it.<\/p>\n -They don’t consider the “teacher” to be skilled\/knowledgeable enough to teach them.\u00a0 Most of the time, the people teaching others in parties have a lot of problems themselves.\u00a0 When the leader cannot keep basic timing and is “teaching” the follower, she’s going to feel very annoyed.<\/p>\n -It’s condescending.\u00a0 By teaching, you are telling this person that you are more advanced than them.\u00a0 \u00a0They might not feel that way!<\/p>\n -The time and place is not right.\u00a0 Maybe someone would like to learn from or practice with you, but you are trying to do it in the party.\u00a0 They just want to enjoy the feeling of dancing and the music and don’t want to be taught at that time.<\/p>\n Teaching someone who doesn’t want to be taught makes them want to dance with you less.\u00a0 Don’t do it!<\/em><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Yes!\u00a0 A student practica is the right time to share feedback.\u00a0 But there is a difference between sharing feedback and teaching.<\/p>\n Teaching- the teacher explains the “correct” way to do something to a student. Examples of teaching vs sharing feedback in the practica:<\/p>\n Teaching: Your step is wrong.\u00a0 It should be like this. Teaching: You are pushing me around with your hands.\u00a0 Lead from your body instead. Sometimes teaching and sharing feedback are almost the same information, but when you share feedback you do not treat the person as your student.\u00a0 You explain your perception and invite them to explain theirs so you can figure out the issue together.\u00a0 If you can’t, you ask for help from a teacher, if they are available, or make a note to ask about it next class time.<\/p>\n *In the practica, share feedback.\u00a0 Don’t teach.*<\/em><\/p>\n Q: What if they ask me to teach them something?<\/p>\n A: If they ask you to teach, then you have their consent.\u00a0 But don’t overstep.\u00a0 Don’t launch into a whole lesson.\u00a0 And consider whether you even want to teach.\u00a0 Even though I am a teacher, I don’t want to teach people in a party.\u00a0 That time is for enjoying!\u00a0 If you would like to teach\/practice with that person and it’s just not the right time, then make another time to do it later.<\/p>\n Q: What do I do if the follower is doing something uncomfortable or dangerous, like throwing herself into a dip?<\/p>\n A: It depends on how serious it is.\u00a0 If there is uncomfortable tension, I would try tensing and relaxing my body where I feel the tension to encourage the follower to do the same.\u00a0 If they are moving too fast, if the energy is flying out of control, I would ground myself more, move more deliberately, and avoid adding energy.\u00a0 I would use less and less energy to encourage them to relax.<\/p>\n If it actually feels dangerous and I can’t avoid the situation by adjusting my leading, then I would say something very brief and direct and non-accusatory, like “Please don’t dip.\u00a0 My back feels very tense.”\u00a0 Actually, I’ve never gotten to this point, but it’s not uncommon for followers to need to speak up.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Q: As a follower, why are people always trying to teach me?\u00a0 Why does it happen to me more than to my friends and how can I stop it?<\/p>\n A: I can think of a couple of possible reasons:<\/p>\n Q: Why do some leaders always “teach” new people in the party but never actually open any classes?<\/p>\n A: Many of them simply like to feel important.\u00a0 A woman with no dance experience is more easily convinced that this leader has knowledge and skill, and that strokes their ego. Others really just think they are helping, and they don’t realize that it’s not appropriate.\u00a0 In either case, don’t encourage them to do this.<\/p>\n Developing a passion to teach is a great thing.\u00a0 Social dance culture needs people to be motivated to learn and improve and share their knowledge with others.\u00a0 If you want to become a teacher, go for it!\u00a0 Work hard, make yourself stand out, develop a good reputation, and look for opportunities to assist or teach a class.<\/p>\n But don’t teach people that are not your students \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":21697,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"default","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[70,77,69,72,80,78,74,71],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21693","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bachata","category-beginner","category-brazilian-zouk","category-etiquette","category-kizomba","category-psychology","category-salsa","category-social-dancing"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21693","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21693"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21693\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21697"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21693"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21693"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flowtaipei.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21693"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Why wouldn’t someone like being taught for free?<\/h4>\n
What about during a practica?\u00a0 That’s the time to share feedback, right?<\/h4>\n
\nSharing feedback- one person shares their feeling\/perception of the situation with the other.\u00a0 This includes how they feel about themself and their partner.\u00a0 In a practica or while training together, this should be 2-way communication where both people are working together.<\/p>\n
\nFeedback: The footwork doesn’t feel right.\u00a0 My step is like this, yours is like this, right?<\/p>\n
\nFeedback: I feel you are pushing me off balance when you lead with your hands.\u00a0 Can you try leading more from your body.\u00a0 How do you feel about my frame?<\/p>\nQ & A<\/h4>\n
\n
\n-ask them not to teach you or suggest to check with a teacher later
\n-give no response at all
\n-tell them that you don’t think what they are saying is correct\/feels comfortable and explain your own feeling (but only if you want to continue talking with them)<\/li>\n